Healthy boundaries are becoming more and more of a popular topic these days. If you didn't grow up in a family with healthy boundaries (and many of us didn't) you wouldn't even know what boundaries look like or that you could have them.
Having boundaries is important because it preserves our energy. If you're constantly letting people in who suck away your energy, you will be left totally empty, exhausted, and unable to operate at your highest frequency. The world needs your light and your energy, so let's get this sorted!
In this podcast episode we'll cover:
Are you confident in being able to distinguish between a good guy and a Gumball Guy on your own? How long does it take you to determine he's not the right one? After this podcast, you'll have a bloodhound nose for sniffing out the bad guys quickly just like me (I just got a puppy so my mind is SO on dogs!!).
If you've been following this podcast for a while, chances are by now you've come to terms with the fact that your ex was a Gumball Guy, or the guy you're dating now is a Gumball Guy (and if not, go back to the beginning!) :)
But now, as you enter back into the dating scene, you might find it difficult to trust your own judgement. You might have a hunch this guy is a Gumball Guy but you're second-guessing yourself. And the longer you are not sure and continue to feel him out, the more time you're wasting, and the more danger you're in of really falling for a Gumball Guy again.
I bet you're saying, "Melissa! I wish you could be sitting at the next table in a disguise...
We've all heard the advice before to "take it slow" so that we don't get hurt again. When a guy says this to you, or when you're thinking you need to do this with a new guy, it may seem sensible, but it's really not.
It's another form of manipulation and control. It's saying, "I haven't done the work to heal from my past relationship, and so I'm going to carry that into this relationship and I expect you to sensor yourself so that I'm not triggered, thank you very much."
In episode 42, we cover:
The Cosmo magazines of the world will tell you you're being ghosted because you're too clingy, or revealing emotions too soon. Guys will tell you they just forgot or don't like to be on their phone all the time. But is that really the case, or is there a deeper, more psychological reason?
A guy from an online dating app texts you, "Hey, what's up." You continue on with a shallow text conversation for a while and finally ask..."Should we meet up?" Suddenly, he becomes the busiest guy in the world and can't find any time to pencil you in but keeps promising you'll meet up some vague time in the future.
By the end of this episode you will know why he does this, why it has nothing to do with you, and you will understand the true pain behind his shallow, distant texts. You will be able to separate his behavior from your self worth.
In this episode, I cover:
Wow, episode number 40!! Thank you all so much who have been listening from the beginning, and those who have joined along the way.
In this episode, I get really vulnerable with you. I want to let you in on what I've struggled with along this journey of coaching and sharing the Gumball Love concept.
As a challenge to you AND to myself, we need to start claiming our success. When someone falls in love with us and sees our best qualities, we need to be able to receive that love.
I let you in on what it was really like for me trying to get this concept of Gumball Love started 10 years ago. It took me a long, long time of fighting my own fears and doubts in order to finally put this idea out there.
And even today, those old feelings of embarrassment creep up--it's hard for me to receive the praise from the girls in the...
One of the girls in the Back to YOU Academy had an amazing revelation that I HAD to share with you (without sharing her name, of course!).
She was about to be going on a date with someone she met online.
And thought, as she was doing the make-up, the hair, choosing the right dress..."Who am I really getting ready for? Why am I dressing up and putting in all this effort for these guys who I don't even know?"
She is still healing from a past relationship and hasn't really gotten to a place yet where she knows who she is and is comfortable in her own skin.
She realized these dates are just a momentary escape that don't really serve her.
She was molding into whatever these guys wanted her to be, and not truly just being herself..because she doesn't know who that is. YET.
The real person you need to be dating right now is in the mirror.
So that eventually, when...
Are you ready to date again? You recently got out of a toxic relationship...cheers to you! So how do you know if you're ready to get back into the dating scene or if you should take a break?
We all know that saying..."To get over him you have to get under someone else." Does that really work? It "works" for Gumball People. And you are not a Gumball Person, because you're reading this post!
In this episode I go over why it's important to hold off on dating after a toxic relationship and how to get ready to date again with examples and of course, analogies...you know I love analogies;)
We underestimate the damage of being in a toxic relationship. Our Gumball ex is that voice of doubt in the back of our minds whenever we do something. Like when you're trying to decide if you should buy a plant or a...
What is it about him? He is putting in almost no effort yet he's the one that makes you feel weak in the knees.
We decode how this guy keeps you reeled in and how you can finally break this pattern.
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Samantha went from being suicidal to creating a whole new life including quadrupling her income. We had exchanged many direct messages and I wanted you to hear her whole story. She shares all the juicy details including her text-only relationship that consumed her entire life for years. She goes deep about her childhood bully turned best friend and going from homeless and jobless to the most successful she has ever been. You will feel as if you are eavesdropping on our conversation as we go down all the bending and winding roads of her journey. I know I could relate on so many levels and I know you will too.
To reach Samantha directly you can email her at [email protected]
Samantha was kind enough to offer her email address if you want to reach out to her with any questions or just to give her feedback. I would love it if you told her your thoughts and how this story has impacted your life. She would be so grateful.
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Girl, I see you. You're a strong, independent woman. You've worked hard. You got that big promotion. You're making your own money. You made that big achievement.
For a long time, as you've been focused on your career, you've been saying, "I don't need no man."
You definitely don't need a man, can't argue with that, but you're here listening to this podcast because you WANT one. And why is it so hard to find one who doesn't turn into a big disappointment? When will Mr. Right appear?
I'm about to give you some tough love.
You're strong and independent because at some point in your childhood or in early dating experiences you learned that you're on your own, you were made to feel that you're not valued, and so you had to tell yourself that you don't need anyone and to prove your worth through your...