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My friend is dating a jerk, how can I help her? [Podcast EP 49]

Sometimes we'd do more to help our friends than we do to help ourselves. We have the best intentions and think we're helping her get over this jerk guy she's dating, but sometimes we're actually making the process longer for her.

This episode will teach you how to compassionately help your friend (or your daughter, or your mom, whoever!) through this tough time, and might even show you how you can be more compassionate to yourself. I have for you 23 tips and questions to ask that I personally use when I'm coaching my girls, to help her see for herself that he is a jerk. You'll find out why telling her to leave him is NOT effective. 

"The goal of the conversation is never to get her to break up with him. Ever." -Melissa Leger, dating expert and creator of Gumball Love

 You can also download and subscribe to this podcast for free on Apple PodcastsGoogle Podcasts, or Spotify, or listen on Youtube.


First! This weeks self care tip:

Book a doctors...

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Why do we always attract the wrong guy? [Podcast EP 48]

Why do we date the wrong guy over and over again? I've covered a lot in the past about why the bad guys (the Gumball Guys) act the way they do, but it's time to talk about YOU. There's two people involved in these relationships and you're one of them, so what's your part in all of this?

In this podcast episode I will cover 9 reasons why you might be caught in this pattern of always dating bad guys (even when you've spent time in therapy!). By the end of this episode you will have the questions to ask yourself in order to really become self-aware about your behavioral patterns and where they came from. You'll also know how joining the Back to YOU Academy can help you go even deeper on finding the root cause of these behaviors and how to truly heal. 

 You can also download and subscribe to this podcast for free on Apple PodcastsGoogle Podcasts, or Spotify, or listen on Youtube.


But first, two self care tips for the week!

1. Block Him

If you've...

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Are You Forcing Yourself to Be Someone You're Not? [Podcast EP 47]

Did you know that before you have a one on one coaching session with me, I don't really know exactly what I'm going to say to you?

It's not because I'm not a good relationship coach. That's definitely not how my clients feel, anyway;)

It's because each and every one of my girls is a totally different person with their own story and challenges. I will customize the call to fit your specific needs.

My message to you in this podcast episode is that we often get caught up in the pressure of trying to do things the "right" way and to force a certain timeline in our pursuit of love. But whose right way? Whose timeline?

We are not meant to all be the same. And we're not meant to all find our life partner in the same way and in the same timeframe. 

We ARE all meant to find our purpose, and we can't do that if we continue to put so much pressure and stress on ourselves to be like everyone else or meet everyone else's expectations.

You feel the most alone...

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How to set boundaries in relationships [Podcast EP 44]

Healthy boundaries are becoming more and more of a popular topic these days. If you didn't grow up in a family with healthy boundaries (and many of us didn't) you wouldn't even know what boundaries look like or that you could have them.

Having boundaries is important because it preserves our energy. If you're constantly letting people in who suck away your energy, you will be left totally empty, exhausted, and unable to operate at your highest frequency. The world needs your light and your energy, so let's get this sorted!

In this podcast episode we'll cover:

  • How to know what your boundaries are
  • Why setting boundaries is important
  • Why we often avoid setting boundaries
  • What happens if you don't set boundaries
  • How to sort out which people in your life are crossing your boundaries
  • What it feels like and looks like to set boundaries (examples)

You can also download and subscribe to this podcast for free on Apple PodcastsGoogle Podcasts, ...

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The Psychological Reason for Ghosting that No One Talks About [Podcast Episode 41]

The Cosmo magazines of the world will tell you you're being ghosted because you're too clingy, or revealing emotions too soon. Guys will tell you they just forgot or don't like to be on their phone all the time. But is that really the case, or is there a deeper, more psychological reason?

A guy from an online dating app texts you, "Hey, what's up." You continue on with a shallow text conversation for a while and finally ask..."Should we meet up?" Suddenly, he becomes the busiest guy in the world and can't find any time to pencil you in but keeps promising you'll meet up some vague time in the future.

By the end of this episode you will know why he does this, why it has nothing to do with you, and you will understand the true pain behind his shallow, distant texts. You will be able to separate his behavior from your self worth.

In this episode, I cover:

    • What "pick-up artists" for men are teaching (and not teaching) to shy, insecure guys, and why it hurts more than it helps
    • Why...
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Are you open to receiving love? [Podcast Episode 40]

You can also download and subscribe to this podcast for free on Apple PodcastsGoogle Podcasts, or Spotify.

Wow, episode number 40!! Thank you all so much who have been listening from the beginning, and those who have joined along the way. 

In this episode, I get really vulnerable with you. I want to let you in on what I've struggled with along this journey of coaching and sharing the Gumball Love concept.

As a challenge to you AND to myself, we need to start claiming our success. When someone falls in love with us and sees our best qualities, we need to be able to receive that love. 

I let you in on what it was really like for me trying to get this concept of Gumball Love started 10 years ago. It took me a long, long time of fighting my own fears and doubts in order to finally put this idea out there.

And even today, those old feelings of embarrassment creep up--it's hard for me to receive the praise from the girls in the...

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Are you Ready to Date Again after a Toxic Relationship?

Are you ready to date again? You recently got out of a toxic relationship...cheers to you! So how do you know if you're ready to get back into the dating scene or if you should take a break?

We all know that saying..."To get over him you have to get under someone else." Does that really work? It "works" for Gumball People. And you are not a Gumball Person, because you're reading this post!

In this episode I go over why it's important to hold off on dating after a toxic relationship and how to get ready to date again with examples and of course, analogies...you know I love analogies;)

You can also download and subscribe to this podcast for free on Apple PodcastsGoogle Podcasts, or Spotify.


Why it's important to wait until you're ready to date again

We underestimate the damage of being in a toxic relationship. Our Gumball ex is that voice of doubt in the back of our minds whenever we do something. Like when you're trying to decide if you should buy a plant or a...

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Why Strong Independent Women Struggle with Finding Love [Podcast]

You can also download and subscribe to this podcast for free on Apple PodcastsGoogle Podcasts, or Spotify.


Girl, I see you. You're a strong, independent woman. You've worked hard. You got that big promotion. You're making your own money. You made that big achievement. 

For a long time, as you've been focused on your career, you've been saying, "I don't need no man."

You definitely don't need a man, can't argue with that, but you're here listening to this podcast because you WANT one. And why is it so hard to find one who doesn't turn into a big disappointment? When will Mr. Right appear?

I'm about to give you some tough love. 

Continue Reading/Listening for the Truth

You're strong and independent because at some point in your childhood or in early dating experiences you learned that you're on your own, you were made to feel that you're not valued, and so you had to tell yourself that you don't need anyone and to prove your worth through your...

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Are you really being rejected? [Podcast]

When you feel like you are being rejected, often you have your expectations too high for that person.  You want them to be more but when they fall short, it can feel like rejection.  Whether it's family, friends or romance, we go deep in talking about the capacity vs. reality and if the rejection you think you are feeling is actually real. 

Want more?

Join the Back to You Academy: Click here!

Book a one-on-one session with me for ultimate clarity

Join the Private VIP Facebook Group

Follow me on Instagram: @themelissaleger

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When he says, "I can't give you what you need" [Podcast]

When the guy you love more than anything in the world says he can't give you what you need, it is devastating.  You feel defensive, you want to fight for the relationship and you search desperately for answers.   

You ask, "Am I asking for too much? How can he just walk away? I thought everything was just fine?  How can he not love me enough to stay and work it out?"

This episode goes deep in to all angles of this helping you decode his behavior and recognize what you can and can't fix, empowering you to move forward without blaming yourself or feeling like you are too much or not enough. 

Want more?

Join the Back to You Academy: Click here!

Book a one-on-one session with me for ultimate clarity

Join the Private VIP Facebook Group

Follow me on Instagram: @themelissaleger

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