In this episode, I felt called to discuss this urgency around needing to "fix" yourself so you can find the right guy and enter into a healthy relationship. I want to tell you to slow down, because trying to go fast and force it will only make the process longer.
In this episode, I discuss:
Many of you have been coming into my DMs or writing in the private Facebook group asking about what are the red flags to know if he's really looking for love or just a hook up?
And I'm going to share these red flags with you in this podcast, but I'm also gonna give you some tough love, because while knowing red flags is great, we need to stop focusing so much on them.
What should you really be focusing on?
If you don't know who you are and what you want, it doesn't even matter if you know the red flags.
And while red flags don't really ever change and can generally be applied as a rule of thumb, your values and the things you're specifically looking for in a partner are highly personal. That means that no one...not I, not another relationship expert...can tell you what to look for.
Join me in this episode as I get real with you about red flags to look for, and how to start thinking about dating differently so you can filter out the bad guys and...
We've all been there...you're texting back and forth with a guy, and the responses are pretty quick in the beginning, everything is exciting, you're getting the butterflies....and gradually, the responses get slower and slower to be returned (or, it's very sudden that he's taking so long to reply).
You start to freak out, thinking he's not interested in you, he's texting another girl, or whatever else our creative minds think up! Your natural response may be to scold him and educate him on how he should be responding, but I want you to consider a different approach.
In this episode, I walk you through the reasons why he may not be texting back right away, why you shouldn't freak out and start imagining worse case scenarios, why you should just wait it out, and what it looks like when you're texting a healthy guy.
There is a reason why you feel exhausted all the time. Your energy is being sucked right out of you. And this is costing you everything- your relationship with friends and family, your career, your finances, and most of all, your happiness. When you're in an unhealthy relationship, you are caught in a vicious cycle I like to call the "Good Bad Ugly".
Good: The honeymoon period after a fight. You're cuddling, having intense sex, he's doing big romantic gestures. It's an extreme, intense high.
Bad: He starts pulling away again. He's not responding to texts, he's acting suspicious, he's spending all his time fixating on a distraction like fantasy sports, porn, drinking, other women or whatever is his personal flavor. You're trying to talk to him and find out what the problem is and he insists nothing's wrong, you're just acting crazy.
Ugly: The big, intense, explosive fight sesh that goes until 4 in the morning. You've said...